When was the last time you looked in a mirror and told yourself you were beautiful?
Whether big or small, tall or short, skinny or overweight, are you able to face your flaws and accept the reflection staring back at you?
Whether big or small, tall or short, skinny or overweight, are you able to face your flaws and accept the reflection staring back at you?
The Basics
Plus size model Ashley Graham is able to do this every day. In fact, her TEDx talk about her journey to body acceptance through modeling begins with her addressing various flaws in front of a standing mirror. Following this, Ms. Graham guides her audience through the lifestyle of a plus size model. From the start of her career at fifteen, she experienced endless negative comments regarding her weight. She explains that many people required clarification because they doubted she was ‘modeling material’. Even one of her peers outed a fat fold above Ms. Graham’s knee in her first magazine spread. Her speech focuses on the struggle of being confident with her body and overcoming the “narrow mold” which society has tried to “squeeze [her] into”. When she finally realizes that she is in fact beautiful, she encourages her audience to share her epiphany and redefine the “global vision of beauty.”
Building the Mood Up
Jay Heinrichs explains in his book "Thank You For Arguing" that “when you want to change someone’s mood, tell a story” (83). In Ms. Graham’s argument, it is crucial that she makes an emotional connection with her audience because Heinrich’s connects our emotions and what we believe (82). During her TEDx talk, she includes several stories spread across her early childhood. She shares how kids in middle school pointed out flaws in her pictures.
When asked about her career, Ms. Graham notes she has to clarify that she’s a plus sized model due to skepticism she has received. She admits that because of other people’s commentary, she used to look in the mirror and hate what she saw. As she finishes her speech, she addresses a conversation with her mother. Her mother taught her not to devalue herself and that true beauty comes within.
Ms. Graham’s multiple stories build towards a mood of empathy; she wants her audience to share her same emotions and be able to understand why they hurt. It is one thing to simply state how being shamed for her weight affected her. Because the audience now has shared her experiences through her stories, they are able to feel and identify the pain caused by body shaming. Simultaneously, the audience understands why they don’t need to feel that pain in their own lives.
Jay Heinrichs explains in his book "Thank You For Arguing" that “when you want to change someone’s mood, tell a story” (83). In Ms. Graham’s argument, it is crucial that she makes an emotional connection with her audience because Heinrich’s connects our emotions and what we believe (82). During her TEDx talk, she includes several stories spread across her early childhood. She shares how kids in middle school pointed out flaws in her pictures.
When asked about her career, Ms. Graham notes she has to clarify that she’s a plus sized model due to skepticism she has received. She admits that because of other people’s commentary, she used to look in the mirror and hate what she saw. As she finishes her speech, she addresses a conversation with her mother. Her mother taught her not to devalue herself and that true beauty comes within.
Ms. Graham’s multiple stories build towards a mood of empathy; she wants her audience to share her same emotions and be able to understand why they hurt. It is one thing to simply state how being shamed for her weight affected her. Because the audience now has shared her experiences through her stories, they are able to feel and identify the pain caused by body shaming. Simultaneously, the audience understands why they don’t need to feel that pain in their own lives.
How do we trust her?
No one has a set in stone answer to end body shaming, but Ms. Graham’s use of craft makes her suggestions toward self-love seem pretty dang close. According to Heinrichs, “the audience should consider you a sensible person, as well as sufficiently knowledgeable to deal with the problem at hand” (69). In order to build this trust, it’s necessary for Ms. Graham to “show off her experience” (70) being shamed. In her speech, she used all of her stories not only to change the mood, but to establish trust.
She was referred to as the “fat model” in her hometown. Many people told her that she would never be on a cover page because of her weight. Ms. Graham explains that she loathed her body image until her mother taught her to take control of her own body and validation. She purposefully delivered her solution after explaining her connection to body shaming to give the audience a chance to build their trust.
The audience first learns that Ms. Graham has been bullied since the start of her career. By the time she suggests and explains the process of “redefining global beauty”, the audience has more than enough reason to trust her. If she is able to overcome such hardships, than the audience believes her wisdom can be applied to anyone who doesn’t love themselves the way Ms. Graham does.
No one has a set in stone answer to end body shaming, but Ms. Graham’s use of craft makes her suggestions toward self-love seem pretty dang close. According to Heinrichs, “the audience should consider you a sensible person, as well as sufficiently knowledgeable to deal with the problem at hand” (69). In order to build this trust, it’s necessary for Ms. Graham to “show off her experience” (70) being shamed. In her speech, she used all of her stories not only to change the mood, but to establish trust.
She was referred to as the “fat model” in her hometown. Many people told her that she would never be on a cover page because of her weight. Ms. Graham explains that she loathed her body image until her mother taught her to take control of her own body and validation. She purposefully delivered her solution after explaining her connection to body shaming to give the audience a chance to build their trust.
The audience first learns that Ms. Graham has been bullied since the start of her career. By the time she suggests and explains the process of “redefining global beauty”, the audience has more than enough reason to trust her. If she is able to overcome such hardships, than the audience believes her wisdom can be applied to anyone who doesn’t love themselves the way Ms. Graham does.
Why we as humans suck.
According to Heinrichs, revealing a tactical flaw “shows your dedication to the audience’s values" (64). Ms. Graham actually reveals two. First, she explains that in the modeling industry, the plus size spectrum encompasses sizes 8-16. These sizes (according to Ms. Graham) include the majority of women. Despite the fact that most women are considered plus sized, Ms. Graham notes that shaming still exists towards fuller women. By addressing this, she makes the audience realize how ridiculous it seems to shame women who are plus sized when in fact almost all women are.
This strategy would make the audience want to provoke change. To further her argument, Ms. Graham also shares a published survey which states that 98 percent of women don’t believe that they are beautiful. That’s a massive amount of women who don’t value themselves the way they should. By sharing these results, she hopes the audience will be motivated to lower the amount of women who don’t share the same values of self-love as they do.
According to Heinrichs, revealing a tactical flaw “shows your dedication to the audience’s values" (64). Ms. Graham actually reveals two. First, she explains that in the modeling industry, the plus size spectrum encompasses sizes 8-16. These sizes (according to Ms. Graham) include the majority of women. Despite the fact that most women are considered plus sized, Ms. Graham notes that shaming still exists towards fuller women. By addressing this, she makes the audience realize how ridiculous it seems to shame women who are plus sized when in fact almost all women are.
This strategy would make the audience want to provoke change. To further her argument, Ms. Graham also shares a published survey which states that 98 percent of women don’t believe that they are beautiful. That’s a massive amount of women who don’t value themselves the way they should. By sharing these results, she hopes the audience will be motivated to lower the amount of women who don’t share the same values of self-love as they do.
How to Accept your reflection
I want to agree with everything Ashley Graham says. I really do. However, it’s hard to include everything in a perfect argument in only 9 minutes. It’s evident that Ms. Graham has more than enough experience with body shaming as a fuller woman, but she fails to delve into the other side of it: the pressure to be skinny. She never mentions the opposite side of the spectrum even once. This leaves a lack of connection towards her and anyone who has been “skinny shamed”. I suppose that this is where her argument lacks.
I can’t say whether or not it won’t cater to skinny women; I am not, nor have I ever been, considered ‘thin’. I feel deeply connected to Ms. Graham’s talk and truly inspired, but I am a plus sized woman; I empathize with her much like many plus size women would.
Despite her lack of scope, I believe Ms. Graham provides more than enough reason to trust her and follow the wise advice that she was kind enough to share. Looking in your mirror and telling yourself that you are loved by you is something worthwhile for all women to do regardless of size. So, take a deep breath. Know that you are perfectly imperfect and that is okay. Take a look in the mirror and look at the person who is staring back, and repeat after me: I am beautiful.
I want to agree with everything Ashley Graham says. I really do. However, it’s hard to include everything in a perfect argument in only 9 minutes. It’s evident that Ms. Graham has more than enough experience with body shaming as a fuller woman, but she fails to delve into the other side of it: the pressure to be skinny. She never mentions the opposite side of the spectrum even once. This leaves a lack of connection towards her and anyone who has been “skinny shamed”. I suppose that this is where her argument lacks.
I can’t say whether or not it won’t cater to skinny women; I am not, nor have I ever been, considered ‘thin’. I feel deeply connected to Ms. Graham’s talk and truly inspired, but I am a plus sized woman; I empathize with her much like many plus size women would.
Despite her lack of scope, I believe Ms. Graham provides more than enough reason to trust her and follow the wise advice that she was kind enough to share. Looking in your mirror and telling yourself that you are loved by you is something worthwhile for all women to do regardless of size. So, take a deep breath. Know that you are perfectly imperfect and that is okay. Take a look in the mirror and look at the person who is staring back, and repeat after me: I am beautiful.